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Corrin Jasinski

Dear Bride: 5 Dumb Thoughts That Happen The Month Before Your Wedding

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I'm a Virginia wedding photographer I am so glad you are here! Grab some coffee, stay a while! Here you will find a little bit about me, my business, and why I love to do what I do!

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When you get engaged, so many people tell you that it’s going to go by SO fast… “You’re wedding day is going to be here before you know it.”  Well, they’re right. As soon as one year hit, time did not slow down. It only seemed to be going faster and faster. I never knew this many emotions could go through a person’s body all at once. It’s a mixture of happy, stressed, overjoyed, nervous, excited, and SO much love. Well, when a month came along, all those feelings intensified 10x more…

May 17. As soon as it became one month before my wedding, something in my body switched… I started to worry and overthink almost everything, and I know I’m not the only bride to do this. Many of my bride’s have said the same thing to me, and I never understood, but now… I understand.

Not only do you overthink, but you aren’t necessarily very positive either. The worst part? You KNOW better; you KNOW not to feel or think this way because you KNOW deep down that everything is going to be okay. Does that do anything though? Nope.

Being a bride to be a month before her wedding day is filled with a lot of overthinking, and today I want to talk about those not so positive thoughts. I also want to talk about ways to change those thoughts into positive ones. Is it going to be easy? If you’re anything like me, no, it won’t be the easiest, but we got this and I’m truly here for you!

5 DUMB thoughts that happen a month before your Big Day:

  1. I need to lose weight.
    • Let’s start off with a blunt statement: You do not need to lose weight.
    • Okay, so you hear that from everyone, if you have even said this thought out loud to someone. It’s true though, you don’t, but if you’re like me, that isn’t enough. You want to look your absolute best on your wedding day… I get it! So want to know what I’m doing?
    • Something I am doing to get this terrible thought out of my head is eating healthier this month. I don’t need to lose weight, but I do want to feel confident on the biggest day of my life. I want to FEEL good, and if I feel good, I will look good!
    • I’m also going to the gym, you don’t have to do this, but if you want to incorporate some walks in your daily routine or even stopping by the gym, it doesn’t hurt and you’ll feel good too!
    • Don’t do anything extreme! This is something you’ll regret. Changing your entire lifestyle in a month will really mess with you and that’s NOT what you want to do. Eat what you want, do what you want! For me, I’m cutting out coffee because of the amount of creamer I use! For me, this works. For most humans, this doesn’t work.
    • Remember, your fiance loves YOU. He loves YOU for everything you are and everything you are going to be, and that is all the matters on your wedding day. When the “I need to lose weight” thought comes in your head, think of him and think of how he sees you… You won’t think that negative thought too much longer!
  2. It’s GOING to RAIN.
    • Blunt statement:  You can’t control the weather and it’s not about the weather.
    • Well, that’s what the people who aren’t getting married in a month are going to tell you… Does it help? Not at all. Are they right? Yeah, we know they are.
    • I don’t have too many solutions to this negative thought yet because I don’t want it to rain just as much as you don’t want it to rain! You paid a lot of money to have this beautiful wedding, and naturally you want everything to go seamlessly. I get it, and I’m there with you.
    • If it does rain though, I promise you, you will regret thinking negatively and not FULLY enjoying your wedding day. I’ve seen it time and time again!
    • I challenge both you and me to put some positive energy into the universe, if you’re into that, and go from there! Mother Nature is going to do her own thing, per usual, and we gotta go with it!
    • Also, your photographer is going to get amazing images regardless! Don’t worry about that!!
  3. I have SO much to do.
    • Blunt Statement:  You got the big things done.. You’re good!
    • Well, this is what I want to say to those people sometimes… “Thanks.” And then walk away. Again, are they right? Yeah. Is that what you want to hear? Not really.
    • You’ve been planning this day for what seems to be forever. You’re going to have things to do until you are walking down the aisle to your boo! What I want you to do though?
    • Write everything that is going on in that head of yours, down on a piece of paper. Yep, do that after you finish reading this post. 😉 Put deadlines beside them, and then do this…
    • ASK FOR HELP
    • Yep, I said it. Ask! People, so many people, want to help you. They WANT to be there for you, so let them! It really does help make you feel better. If you do happen to be super type A, color code it up!
    • You got this; you’ll get it done, and if you don’t, oh freakin’ well! If you got the dress, your man, and a pastor, you have enough to get married! That’s what I’m trying to tell myself at least! I don’t even have shoes yet (EEK)!
  4. Nothing is going to turn out the way I want it to.
    • Blunt Statement:  Everything is going to look absolutely amazing and perfect! No one is even going to notice or remember the little details.
    • Yeahhhhh, people really need to stop saying that because that really isn’t helping.
    • You spend literally thousands and thousands of dollars for your wedding day to happen, and those details that “no one is going to remember”… Yep, they are added up in those thousands and thousands of dollars.
    • This is another point where I don’t have too many suggestions because I am there with you, but I’ll let you in on what I’ve been doing that helps for the most part.
    • I take all the pictures (my dress, his suit, Pinterest inspiration) and line them all together, so I can see what they look like somewhat together! It helps a little. I’m not going to lie, it’s hard not being able to see everything together until THE wedding day! Trust your gut though! It will look beautiful!
  5. Something is going to go wrong on my wedding day.
    • This blunt statement is straight from me, the girl who does this for a living… Something WILL go wrong.
    • It just will and there isn’t anything you can do about that because when you have multiple people doing multiple things, something is bound to not go exactly as planned.
    • I’m not very good at being “go with the flow”, but if you are, do just that! Try and just take things as they go. You have a month to get better at this, so we can work on this point together!

Also, something to keep in mind, if any of your sentences start with “What if”, just stop right there. What if questions are questions that you, for the most part, have no control over.

Overall, I want you to know that these thoughts are completely natural and okay, many, many brides have them. We don’t talk about them though because, for some reason, in this day in age we need to try to portray ourselves as always being okay and happy. You are allowed to feel the way you are feeling, but know that there are ways to make yourself feel better, even just a little bit.

I challenge you to go and find a friend that is engaged or recently married and talk with them; be open and honest because, believe it or not, they have probably gone through the same exact feelings as you. Being able to relate and talk to someone during this time is SO beneficial and helpful!

I truly hope this post helps at least one of you brides to be out there. I hope it makes you feel better, maybe a little less stressed, and, heck, just more ready and happy for your wedding day to get here! YOU GOT THIS! WE GOT THIS!

Comment below with questions or thoughts! I’d love to help in any way that I can!

xoxo

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I'm a Virginia wedding photographer I am so glad you are here! Grab some coffee, stay a while! Here you will find a little bit about me, my business, and why I love to do what I do!

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